Starting to Feel It

Welp, we're 3 months it and the stress is finally kicking in. I'm doing a pretty good job keeping a cool exterior, but really I'm becoming a bit undone. That doesn't mean that I'm having second thoughts or cold feet or anything. I'm very sure of my decision to marry Keith. It's all the other stuff. Financially I'm not really sure how this is going to fall into place (I'm sure it will and I'm trying not to drive myself crazy, but it's a bit scary). And all those little details that I keep saying I can't do until later are finally here. Everyone keeps telling me to enjoy the process and all the highs and lows that go with it and i'm really trying to keep that in mind.
I'm having fun with some parts of it...I have my final fitting next month and these little meeting with our minister are actually pretty enjoyable. The parts that are getting to me are who to invite, who to have bring guests, and where to seat everyone. I'm also getting VERY anxious about my shower. I hate being the center of attention (I know, I teach...should be used to it, but this is different). My mother wanted to keep the date a surprise, but she ended up telling me which is for the better as now I don't have to worry about that. Now that I know when it is I just have to gear myself up for it. I know that it'll be fun, but I have a tendency to act strange when I know people are watching and to get a bit short tempered. I'm realizing that that sounds kind of selfish. After all, all those people are coming out for me and Keith and that's special....and I am appreciative...just a bit anxious. Bottom line is that I understand when people say that they just can't wait for it to get here. I'm tired of thinking about it already....